Funny jokes for you.....my lovalble readers

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load
Of seniors down a highway
When he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts,

Which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder

Again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again

He asks the little old lady,

"why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?".

"We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.

The puzzled driver asks,

"Why do you buy them then?"

The old lady replied,

"We just love the chocolate around them."

A bored woman says to her husband

A bored woman says to her husband as she clasps her hands together,
"Guess what I have in here and you'll get some loving tonight."

The equally bored husband, wishing to avoid any kind of sex at all
replies, "An elephant".

The wife sez "That's close enough!"

Five Fingers

A beautiful young woman marries this seventy year old bloke for his money.
On their wedding night she joyfully jumps into bed and he holds up five
fingers.

"Oh darling!" she squeals with delight, Does that mean five times?"
"No", says the old fellow, "it means that you can pick one out."