Approximately ten excuses for not doing homework:

• I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.

• I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn't actually reach it.

• I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin.

• I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove that it converged.

• I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.

• I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.

• I couldn't figure out whether I am the square of negative one or I am the square root of negative one.

• I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee, and then I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.

• I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but this morning I couldn't find it.